Subpar
Why is it that some people think they are just too good to interact with others at work? I always have to walk around because my supervisor is on the other side of my floor and earlier, before lunch I walked by some dude, that is pretty high up, but I don't know his name. So I smiled and he just stared at me like I was a nobody. In my head, I was like, "Sheesh!!! Can't you even smile back? Or say hello? What the fuck?" So I just kept walking shaking my head in disbelief. I hate people who think they are above others in the work place(well actually, they ARE, TECHNICALLY) and go out of their way to make them know it. Screw them...if I could, I'd take it outside w/ em...ha ha ha. Oh well, yet another thing to shrug off...

I am Alfalfa's untameable cowlick...

Little surprises
We surprised my sister w/ a lil birthday dinner last night. I think she really really enjoyed it. All of her favorite food was there, and a night of VMA's...it was awesome. Here's another lil surprise, the annoying dude at work was being as obnoxious as usual, but I overheard him telling someone he couldn't make an engagement because he had some volunteer work to do. Impressive...annoying stupid people are still, good people I guess. I just don't understand how he can be such a moron when it comes to everything else. Narrowminded, crass, sexist, all that...but yet he volunteers... So underneath all that stuff that just makes me want to throw him through the window, there's a hint of something I do like...what a surprise...

Today's Deep Thought
I think a pillow should be the peace symbol, not the dove. The pillow has more feathers than the dove, and it doesn't have a beak to peck you with.

Appreciation for the day
1. Leftover food
2. AIM
3. Protective Friends

"The voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes."
-Marcel Proust

Incompetence
You know who suck? People. Especially people who are SUPPOSED to be experts in their field but don't know shit and botch up a job you needed them to do, and wouldn't have much time to fix it if they fucked it up. So for my sister's birthday, on Saturday, I am giving her this incredibly cute picture of London blown up to 8x10 and framing it. Naturally, I need to find a professional photo shop to get this done the right way. So I go to this photo place, knowing that I could've done it myself, but wanted the most superior work done. So I picked up my sister's b-day gift today during lunch and lo and behold, the did the picture all wrong!!! Even a simpleton would've realized I didn't want part of London's hair cut off!!! SHHHHHHEEEEEEESSSSSHHHHHH I was soooooooooo irritated, but I wouldn't have anything to give to my sister on her b-day cuz it'd take too long to reproduce again, so I'm gonna try to do it myself today and frame it, but if not, just frame the botched job w/ a note in the card saying that the photoplace fucked it up and a replacement is on it's way....one word...FUCK!

I am a golf tee...

What a gip
I'm hungry, so I wanted to get a hot pocket from the vending machine, only to find that they are $1.10 !!! Dude, a little over a dollar for a single HOT POCKET?!?! What the heck? Man, you buy three of those and you can afford to buy a 10-pack from Albertsons or something. Geez, what a rip-off. So I better get my ass to Costco and load up on Hot Pockets, maybe even sell them myself...shoooooooot. It's just sad how you can make such a huge profit on people's hunger. Take soda form MacDonald's for example, a large soda can cost no more than $0.05!!! And they sell it for like more than a dollar, shit, if that's not making a killing off people, then someone slap me. Bet oh well, man's(or woman's) gotta live, I guess...

Deep thoughts
I told found'em that I was gonna change my blog name to "Deep Thoughts, by Jay Bermudez," but I thought better of it...instead, as often as possible, I will try to dedicate a deep thought to the man, Jack Handey. Today's deep thought is...

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.

"Man with hand in pocket, feel cocky all day"

Respecting boundaries
Do you ever wonder if there are people who just do NOT respect other people's boundaries? And this time, I'm talking about talking too loud. At work there's some dude, who always talks so damn loud, whether it's on the phone or to other coworkers. I wonder if he can't hear how loud he's talking, but I don't think so, becaue I have heard him whisper on occasion. I want to get a tape recorder and record a day at work and then play it back for him to show him, he he he. It's such a disturbance sometimes, when the atmosphere is usually on the quiet/professional side. NOW I know what those people in the library feel like when people are being too loud(I never went to the library...just saw it on TV and stuff)!!! Is it just me? Or am I getting old? OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am the hangnail that you cannot take out...

Bad timing
You know what sucks? Timing. How you miss things, how things miss you, all because the have to happen at moments of our lives where if you had one second here, or 2 minutes there, and hour earlier, or whatever... I missed 3 phone calls from my friend in Europe last night, geez, least to say I was bummed. I mean that's going through a lot of trouble just to do that...AND from the vm that I got, she needed some advice, but I had to be in the bathroom at the time...goodness. Well, I know that things don't happen exactly according to OUR will, but I'm just pointing out how the might be's and what if's come about... But hey, life goes on right? Dang, if I only realized that earlier...HA HA HA

Spilling the beans
Okay, if you cheated on someone(and this is strictly a hypothetical question, well maybe not really, but it in no way pertains that I have EVER cheated on someone, because I am one of the biggest opponents of monogamous relationships!) okay, so if you cheated on someone and naturally, the relationship went sour, and then you went out w/ a friend, hust to hang out, would you tell him/her? I mean okay, say you're not best friends or anything, but you're good friends, good enough that you talk regularly and hang out every now and then. And he/she asks you what happened, would you be honest enough w/ this friend to tell them that you cheated? That you messed up and took the wrong path? If it was me, I would say yes, but apparently, for others it's not. Honesty, goodness, why is it soooo hard to come by these days. Yeah, of course there's fear of judgement, but hey, what will the person think if they ever found out you lied?

So long, farewell...
Geez. everyone is leaving. Last night there was a going away bonfire for yet another one of my friends who's moving away. How sad, that's 5 people I've had to say good-bye to in a month. Where is everyone going? On with their lives I suppose. Well, we're all on separate paths and a lot of times they diverge, but may yet converge somewhere down the line. Good luck to all of you! Maybe I might as well leave...

"The highest reward for a person's toil is not what they get for it, but what they become by it."
-John Ruskin

I am a chili-cheese dog...

The Olefactor
I was walking around the office this morning when I caught a whiff. Instantly, I my mouth began to salivate, and I was hungry, even though I had just had a delicious granola bar. What was this aroma that aroused my hunger so quickly? Fried chicken. What is it about the smell of fried chicken that makes you wanna have some, right then and there? My roomate told me it was the grease... I say it's the CHICKEN!!! There's a hormone that is released or something...mmmmmm fried chicken.....

"After the rain, the rainbow...."

I am a packet of pop rocks...

Eventful weekend
Went to two going away parties, Friday and Saturday. Friday's was an intimate setting w/ a few friends over beers. Saturday was a 70's theme night that involved lots of drinking, and a gay guy being overly agressive and hitting on me and my other straight friends. Yeah, we can joke and laugh but there is a line that some peopel should just NOT cross...so I got annoyed by it, well mind you, I was drunk. He he he. I also saw a million movies this weekend, Bridget Jone's Diary, Someone like you, and again and again, Lord of the Rings. I also saw In the Line of Fire. All great movies. I suggest you see them if you haven't yet.but more or less that was the weekend...

Persistence
How much persistence is too much persistence. People are always saying, just be patient, and you gotta be persistent, and dadadadadadada. But isn't there such thing as too persistent? I mean it shouldn't have to be this hard. It shouldn't be just about ME being persitent and patient. If it's not happening now, then it's just not the right timing. I'm not saying throw it all out and forget the whole thing, but in my opinion, everything in life is about two-way streets. What I'm trying to say is that things go BOTH ways. Yes, I know this sounds so contradictory because I am a firm believer of doing things w/o expecting anything in return. So don't get confused between unconditional relationships and reciprocity. Because there HAS to be reciprocity for a relationship to work. Give and don't expect, but you have to use your head too.

"To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance."
-Oscar Wilde

I am Edward Nigma...

Things that make you go hmmmm....
I wonder why people have so much trouble expressing themselves. Is it a matter of self-confidence? Is it a matter of being afraid of the reaction that might occur if this person WERE to express him/herself? It just boggles me because I think w/ a lil more expressiveness, our lines of communications would run tip-top. No reading between the lines, no trying to "read" people at all...ah, what a world it would be...

"Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down..."

Competition....
You think that there's such thing as being TOO competitive? I do. I personally do not think that seeing everything as a type of competition is very healthy. Because then that leads to ruling out any type of fun in any particular activity if you're not as good as everyone else. Why can't some people just enjoy doing SOMETHING w/ friends and not have to be winning or otherwise not play at all? It's ridiculous. I mean, I for one, am a big supporter of healthy competiveness, because it drives us each to try our hardest and to put forth more effort...but there is a thresh hold that once exceeded, delves off into an air of such strong competition that no good can come out, because if one feels that he/she cannot compete, then he/she will not partake at all, and that's where everything falls apart at the seams...

I am a pinata(sorry, I don't know how to make a tildy) AFTER the party has ended.

Going nowhere
Has it realy been 3 days since I last blogged? My goodness, I must have been busy, I must have actually been working! Ha ha ha. To tell you the truth, I have been...stupid programs have bugs in them so corrections I have ALREADY made needed to be made again. It really felt like I was going nowhere and getting no work done...but hey, I WAS working soo....there!

"Keep you eyes on the prize, and you will never go astray..."

I am a salmon swimming upstream...

Titles
Why are people soooooo caught up on titles? Is it a date or not a date? Is he/she my bf/gf or not? What's the deal? Seems as if the title is more important than the relationship itself. If you ACT like you're together, then you ARE together. I mean, objectively speaking, if someone walking down the street were to see and THINK that you might be together, then doesn't that speak for itself? Why does there have to be an official title? Oh well, I'm just complainin, not because it's happening to me, but I'm just tired of hearing it, about it, whatever...

Chillin...
This weekend was filled w/ relaxing and more relaxing. I watched the ENTIRE Lord of the Rings DVD w/ Chris, including every behind the scenes piece. My friend Ellen moved to NYC on Sunday, and had a going away party on Sat. Again, it was chill, and after we(me and Chris) went to another friend's place to have dinner and chill and talk over wine...still chill. Sunday, went on a run(not-so-chill) and played basetball(plain stupid of me) so now I'm hella sore. But yesterday, overall was still....C-H-I-L-L

Emotions
I said that the going away party was pretty chill...whcih brought about another observation...about emotions. These same friends, 3 or 4 years ago would be cryin their eyes out when one of us moved away, even went away for only a year...we were soo emotional back then. Maybe we've grown up a little? Realized that it's not really good bye but see ya later? Or have we grown more stoic as time has passed and are just not affected? I'd like to think it was the previous rather than the latter because I'd hope that that's how friendships evolve.

"In friendship lies one of the most basic necessities of life....love."

I am a lil ray of sunshine...

YAY
No time for a long blog today...it's friday dammit. But here are some parting thoughts...

1) Directions... Why can't people just follow them?
2) Coworkers who bring you food... They're the best!
3) Sisters who boycott their brothers because brother has been busy... too funny.
4) Flexible schedules... I'm going HOME!!!!

Life isn't about winning or losing, it's about learning...

I am an old shoe...

Just me
Someone asked me other day, "Do you ever feel like you're just Jay?" And, being my usual mindless self, I responded with, "I always feel like I'm just Jay." So we went on to talk about how back in school we really made an impact, and people knew who we were and we really felt like somebodies. Then, his first question finally made sense, and I thought about it. Well, actually, I don't really feel like I'm just Jay, but at the same time I do. I will always be just Jay, a child who is grateful for so many blessings that I don't even deserve. On the other hand, I am Jay Bermudez, and I know that as long as I'm trying my best to make my impact, although it may not stand out as much as it did while I was in school, I am being all that I can be. Yes, it was cool to know that I was a mover and a shaker in school, but as with everything else...life goes on. It's a lot harder, but it IS possible to find something where you are making a great contribution. It's just a new scene... I AM just Jay...

"It takes 42 muscles to frown at somebody, but only 4 muscles to lift your arm and slap'em."

I am a whistle...

No pain, no gain
So I'm trying to get a consistent workout schedule goin. I mean, I've been running somewhat constantly or playing basketball, so the cardio is somewhat there. But lately, I've been hitting the weights...and BOY am I SORE. But at the same time it feels good...not good like, sex good (ummmm, not like I know what that would be like), but like when you know you're getting a workout BECAUSE you're hurting. What a weird, conflicting, out of the ordinary combination of feelings. Satisfaction...that's the word. But hey, no pain, no gain, right?

"Smile, and the world smiles with you. Fart, and you stand alone..."

I am a goldfish cracker...

Kids, don't cha just love'em?
A conversation w/ a friend of mine yesterday brought up the topic of children, and why adults love them so much. We came to the conclusion that adults love kids so much and at the same time envy them. We all want to be kids again, to have that innocent, carefree, no stress type of life. We envy the way they can be totally honest, or silly, or goofy and not have to worry about people watching them, because they don't care what they'll think. And that is one of the keys to being happy as an adult, in my opinion at least. We all have to be able to be kids at times, to be goofy and silly and not care if other people are watching. Well, actually, they could care that other people are watching and follow their example. Child-like is a lot different from childish...remember that.

Things aren't always as they seem...
I always thought that swans were beautiful peaceful creatures...but...

-Swans will drown a duck or goose that gets too close. They have been known to stab people with their beaks and have occasionally broken arms. Swans will jump into a boat to attack people, and with their 8-foot wingspread can sweep a small child overboard. They will also chase people for considerable distances on land.

Yikes!

"It is only through the heart that one sees rightly"

I am a red pen...

Goin down like flies...
Today begins the day of the big layoff. So far at this point about 6 people have been laid off already, two of them my good friends. And everyone else is just waiting around to see if they get canned. Man what a cut throat type environment we live in. It's just so cruel to see such a thing happen to such good people. Well, all one can do at this point is hope and pray...

What is the world coming to?
It's nice to read the news and find something like this...

HONG KONG, China -- A dense blanket of pollution, dubbed the "Asian Brown Cloud," is hovering over South Asia, with scientists warning it could kill millions of people in the region, and pose a global threat.

GASP!!!! Look what we've brought into this once beautiful world. Sometimes I think we are a plague to the earth because of the responsibility we DON'T practice. It breaks my heart to think that one day, my kids will have to face the problems that they didn't have any thing to do with bringing about. They will suffer the consequences of OUR actions. This is only one of the articles people about the global threats that are quickly growing and spreading. It isn't too late...or is it?

Recap
The weekend was chill, got to go to a WEEZER concert on Friday w/ a friend of mine. It was AWESOME!!! Her brother hooked us up so we could move up from the lawn to 3rd row for about 15-20 minutes! Crazy, huh. Saturday, spent some time w/ the bubs, my sister, her friend and her two lil bubsies. I had to take care of all the kids while they did their laundry, which was cool. After that, had a quaint lil dinner w/ a couple friends, went home and relaxed all night, and all day the next day until church...that was about it...

Doesn't it suck when
Someone is totally relationship material, but they're already in one? =(

"Here's a lil trick to life. When it throws you a curve ball, swing away. Who cares what happens..."

That's incredible
I read in the paper today that a crow, by the name of Betty, has figured out to MAKE her own damn tools to get food. Mind you, it was just about bending this piece of wire to fetch the bucket, but geez!!!! Animals MAKING a tool? Let's give them a round of applause(notice the sarcasm?)! But the funny part was that they were trying to figure out who was smarter, because Abel, the other crow, would just steal the food from Betty after she got it, and Abel was bigger and stronger so naturally, Betty did not fight. So who was smarter, the one who made the tool? Or the one who waited for the other to do the work and take it? What a riot....

I am a slice of cheddar cheese.....

Culture
Isn't it amazing what kind of different cultures there are in our beautiful lil world? But you know what culture trips me out? It's Elevator culture! Why is it right when you step in an elevator, all conversation ceases? No one wants to talk and all the smiles disappear. I mean does that only happen when I walk in? I'd hope not, and I think it happens to pretty much every one of us. It's just crazy, how life almost pauses during that elevator trip. It seems like everyone's either afraid of each other or hates each other. And when it's like that, it seem like it takes an hour to get to your floor...talk about your awkward situations. So since I like to stir things up all the time, I say something in the elevator this morning...tried to make a joke. No laughs, just a small forced smile and some held back giggles...it's ridiculous, I tell you. So next time you're in an elevator, smile at everyone(if there's people inside) and say hi...and see what happens. SOmetimes you actually get some non comatose personalities in there, but hey, that's the culture...

"Life isn't a race or some type of contest, it's a journey."

I am a silent, sad, sad little bird....

A moment of silence...
LOS ANGELES -- Chick Hearn, who made ''slam dunk'' and ''air ball'' common basketball expressions during his 42-year broadcasting career with the Los Angeles Lakers, died Monday night. He was 85. -courtesy of ESPN

Strength
It's pretty funny how we measure strength, whether it's physical strength, emotional, or psychological. Physical strength is measured by how much weight someone, anyone can put up...there's milestone weights like plates. But rarely do people take into account the proportion of the weight lifted to the weight lifter. But two people who lift the same weight, but one is smaller than the other, then the smaller is stronger pound for pound. Meatheads get all the credit...but they SHOULD be lifting all that weight, they're bigger! Now the emotional and mental... from experience, it seems as though we measure strength by someone's ability NOT to cry. That's just sad. So being stoic is a form of strength? Or not crying when you're sad? That means you're strong? Bullshit...strength is the ability to DEAL with things, and be able to carry on, through thick and thin. My friend Marlene? She is truly strong...yes, she did not cry today at her father's funeral (at least I didn't see her cry), but that's not why. She was able to take care of him up to the day he died in their house, and to let him have his final wishes granted, which was to pass on while at home. She was ready to say goodbye. And she spend his final days w/ him, by his bedside. I'm sure she cried... a lot...but she really has dealt with it in a way in which I could never imagine myself doing. That, ladies and gentlemen, is STRENGTH...

"Pain is only weakness leaving the body..."

I am wheezy the penguin...

MIA
Sheesh, it's been a while since my last blog...but not much has happened either...so things are just whatever I guess...

Murphy's Law
Shees...Another long week gone by, and another long weekend it was. Well, we went to Vegas this weekend...and I'm still tired. It was a good weekend, but not really, if you know what I mean. First of all, I lost more than I had expected to lose, but that's okay...but once one things go wrong, it's a freakin domino effect, and you can pretty much expect the rest of your day to get shot to shit. So I'm already down a lot of $$$, and we go home around 4-ish... So of course there's traffic pretty much the whole way, and I'm already tired. When we finally get to the 91, I get pulled over by the CHP for a freakin "unsafe lane change!!!" The freakin cop was such so in a bad mood to...saying, "If I hadn't slowed down, you would've hit me." Yeah right asshole... Okay, so then, when I get home, I get a message on the answering maching saying..."Hello Mr. Bermudez, If you could please call us back ASAP, there's something wrong w/ the rent check..." I was like, "WHAT THE?!?!?!" It turns out that I just dated it wrong, but I mean, GOODNESS, what else could possibly happen to me today? Well, I could get a bloody nose, which I did get....can you believe that? All I could do short of breaking down into a fit of rage was to just laugh...and I did...and so did everyone else... This morning however, things seem to be going well...maybe things will turn around....PLEASE?!?!

"Keep love to thyself and happiness is extinguished. Share love with others and happiness will spread like wildfire."